My Holiday
Last month, i went to jakarta. I went there by car. Iwent there with my parents. i stayed at the hotel and it was quite nice. I ate dinner with my parents and i ate seafood. The next day, i had breakfast at the hotel and the breakfast was so delicious. Then i went to the mall. There, i bought some goods for my friends and cousins. After that, i has some lunch and its so yummy because its my favourite food. Then, i went back to the hotel and then, i swam in the swimming pool because its so hot there. After that, i had dinner and its so delicious. Then, i went to the hotel and have some sleep and the next day, i went home
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ReplyDeleteI think this composition is to short and not really detail about the activities done each day. There are some mistakes in capitalisations that the writer might want to fix. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteYou should improve your skill in making the reader enjoys reading your story. Try to fix some wrong capitalisations and also i found some wrong grammar. :))
ReplyDeleteTry to make it longer. I think it is way too short and check again your grammar. There are also many wrong capitalisations :)
ReplyDeleteI think your composition was too short and not in well-packed story. The readers will difficult to read your story and there were some grammar mistakes and wrong capitalisations. Try to fix it and make it longer to make the reader easy to understand what you're telling :)
ReplyDeleteMy opinion about your writing is good but you need to make more detail , add more information to it, and avoid repetition
ReplyDeleteYour story is really short and lacks details. You should also check your grammar as I spotted some mistakes there. Please pay more attention to your grammar to make the writing more understandable:)
ReplyDelete1. Font is too small for my eyes.
ReplyDelete2. Use 'I' instead of 'i'
3. Too short
4. Put more attempts to have more exciting ideas that can attract your readers.
5. Recount writing always uses V2
Practise more.